Joke of the Day...

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12 years 9 months ago #31766 by MrMarty51
Replied by MrMarty51 on topic Joke of the Day...
:cowboy: :rotfl: :rotfl: :cowboy:

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12 years 9 months ago #31776 by Siscowet
Replied by Siscowet on topic Joke of the Day...
This is something happens a few times a year around here. This is actually a pretty clever way to do it.

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12 years 9 months ago #32445 by jtallen83
Replied by jtallen83 on topic Joke of the Day...
A story about change, my Mother sent me this;

There's an old sea story about a ship's Captain
Who inspected his sailors, and afterward told
The first mate that his men smelled bad...
The Captain suggested perhaps it would
Help if the sailors would change underwear
Occasionally.
The first mate responded, "Aye, aye sir,
I'll see to it immediately!"
The first mate went straight to the sailors
Berth deck and announced, "The Captain
Thinks you guys smell bad and wants you
To change your underwear."
He continued,
"Pittman, you change with Jones,
McCarthy, you change with Witkowski,
And Brown, you change with Schultz."
THE MORAL OF THE STORY:
Someone may come along and promise
"Change",
But don't count on things smelling any better.

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12 years 9 months ago #32474 by MrMarty51
Replied by MrMarty51 on topic Joke of the Day...
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An elderly married couple was at home watching TV.
The husband had the remote and was switching back and forth between a golf channel and the porn channel.
The wife became more and more annoyed and finally said:
"For god's sake! Leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to golf!"

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12 years 6 months ago #35574 by MrMarty51
Replied by MrMarty51 on topic Joke of the Day...
A lady was filling her tank at a gas station, smoking a cigarette, even though all the signs say not to. The fumes that came out of the gas tank ignited, severely burning her hands.

But it also lit up her arm, too!

Instead of rolling on the ground to put it out, she panicked. She took off running down the street.

A police car was at the intersection where it happened and he tried to stop her to put out her arm, but she just kept running and screaming. All the officer could think of doing was to shoot her in the knee. This took everyone by surprise. The officer ran over to her and put the fire out, then called for an ambulance.

When questioned about his course of action to stop her, the officer said, "My only thought was to stop her. After all, she was waving a fire-arm."

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12 years 6 months ago #35720 by faawrenchbndr
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12 years 6 months ago #35723 by MrMarty51
Replied by MrMarty51 on topic Joke of the Day...
:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :cowboy:

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12 years 6 months ago #35730 by silver78
Replied by silver78 on topic Joke of the Day...
Betty Lou was 16 years old and had her first high school boyfriend. She had questions about sex but she did not want to ask her mother. Her aunt was younger and a bit wilder than her mother so she went to see her.

Aunt Cindy I have a question about sex said Betty Lou - can you get pregnant from anal sex?

Aunt Cindy promptly replied - of course you can get pregnant from anal sex.... where do you think lawyers come from?
The following user(s) said Thank You: MrMarty51

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12 years 6 months ago #35850 by Dabu
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The following user(s) said Thank You: MrMarty51

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12 years 6 months ago #35863 by MrMarty51
Replied by MrMarty51 on topic Joke of the Day...

silver78 wrote: Betty Lou was 16 years old and had her first high school boyfriend. She had questions about sex but she did not want to ask her mother. Her aunt was younger and a bit wilder than her mother so she went to see her.

Aunt Cindy I have a question about sex said Betty Lou - can you get pregnant from anal sex?

Aunt Cindy promptly replied - of course you can get pregnant from anal sex.... where do you think lawyers come from?

OK, I thank Youd on this one but, I do have a couple of friends that are attourneys and they is mighty fine folk and I do hold a mighty high degree of respect to them , they too are firearms owners and We do go out once in a while and do some shoooting.

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